LAST DOOR ON THE RIGHT

Mon Nov 7
firstbook: Our friends at Random House Children’s Books have generously agreed to donate one brand-new book for each new follower we gain on Tumblr, Facebook, and Twitter this week. Those books will go to thousands of schools and programs serving kids from low-income families across the country. Please Re-blog! To learn more about First Book, please visit: www.firstbook.org

firstbook:

Our friends at Random House Children’s Books have generously agreed to donate one brand-new book for each new follower we gain on Tumblr, Facebook, and Twitter this week. Those books will go to thousands of schools and programs serving kids from low-income families across the country.

Please Re-blog!

To learn more about First Book, please visit: www.firstbook.org

Wed Jun 17
willzone: Coop Neighbors Up the Ante With More Soiled Undies Here’s the story in, ahem, brief.  Awful hoteliers built a hotel with outdoor deck which is bordering peoples apartments.  Hotel guests party it up all night and are loud while neighbors try to sleep.  So guerilla tactics are now in play.  They hang soiled undies next to the roofdeck to ward off people.   I sent this to Willzone today.  Teehee.

willzone:

Coop Neighbors Up the Ante With More Soiled Undies

Here’s the story in, ahem, brief.  Awful hoteliers built a hotel with outdoor deck which is bordering peoples apartments.  Hotel guests party it up all night and are loud while neighbors try to sleep.  So guerilla tactics are now in play.  They hang soiled undies next to the roofdeck to ward off people. 

 I sent this to Willzone today.  Teehee.

Fri May 15
“ 1-800-Mattress claims the last ‘S’ is for ‘Savings’. Well tonight, the ‘M’ is for ‘MURDER’.

Chuck Scarborough, NBC News at 11, reporting on the murder of the wife of the guy who founded 1-800-Mattress (via dontcookbilly) (via willzone)

This is bullshit.  I linked the NYPost article to my facebook yesterday with the heading “Leave of the last “S” for Slayings”.  I am way funnier than that pederast Chuck Scarborough. 
Mon May 11
magistrae: Cookies for The Boy.  And by “The Boy” you surely mean your nephew, my son.  You remember him?  The boy who loves cookies?  I will expect the package by Thursday. 

magistrae:

Cookies for The Boy.

 And by “The Boy” you surely mean your nephew, my son.  You remember him?  The boy who loves cookies?  I will expect the package by Thursday. 

Wed May 6
rulesformyunbornson: LET’S TRY SOMETHING NEW!  Reblog with your own caption or rule to accompany the above photograph. The best entry will be published in the upcoming book Rules for My Unborn Son (available for pre-order here!)  Image via Flickr  Find a family-owned neighborhood restaurant and go there so often that they know your name and what you drink. 

rulesformyunbornson:

LET’S TRY SOMETHING NEW!  Reblog with your own caption or rule to accompany the above photograph. The best entry will be published in the upcoming book Rules for My Unborn Son (available for pre-order here!)  Image via Flickr

 Find a family-owned neighborhood restaurant and go there so often that they know your name and what you drink. 

Mon May 4
deleteyourself: Print this out and memorize it just in case you get home tonight and dinner isn’t ready.  I am thinking that my wife seeing me in a loin cloth would disable her with laughter. 

deleteyourself:

Print this out and memorize it just in case you get home tonight and dinner isn’t ready.

 I am thinking that my wife seeing me in a loin cloth would disable her with laughter. 

Thu Jan 15
willzone: soupsoup: johncarney: Meet the Hero of Flight 1549 This man needs a tickertape parade down the canyon of heros.  Who is with me? 

willzone:

soupsoup:

johncarney:

Meet the Hero of Flight 1549

This man needs a tickertape parade down the canyon of heros.  Who is with me? 

Sat Jan 3
$3 million theft from comic Dane Cook is no joke at all

I think the title of this article should be “Dane Cook Finally Does Something Funny”. 

Wed Dec 31
willzone: (via phazerblast) I just drove thru Mianus this weekend.  That place stinks.  Nobody likes Mianus

willzone:

(via phazerblast)

I just drove thru Mianus this weekend.  That place stinks.

 Nobody likes Mianus

Mon Dec 29
magistrae: weebleswobble: a few weeks ago sissy brother and i stopped by the pharmacy by our house and noticed a pet shop we had never noticed before. we stared for a good twenty minutes at the yorkies in the window. i asked the price (how much is that doggy in the window, arf, arf) and we returned home to my mother gushing. my mother responded that it seemed like we hadn’t thought much about this.. and we hadn’t.. the trip from store to house is at most 2 and a half minutes. we dropped the idea. but today my mom went to the deli to get turkey. and she stopped by the pet shop. she took my step dad back later in the day and they disappeared for a good two hours. they came home and told us to come back and se the puppies with them. we all jumped up and met the puppies. an hour later i walked out with this girl. i introduce to you the new puppy. she is yet to be named. Welcome home, pup!  I guess this is my new niece?

magistrae:

weebleswobble:

a few weeks ago sissy brother and i stopped by the pharmacy by our house and noticed a pet shop we had never noticed before. we stared for a good twenty minutes at the yorkies in the window. i asked the price (how much is that doggy in the window, arf, arf) and we returned home to my mother gushing. my mother responded that it seemed like we hadn’t thought much about this.. and we hadn’t.. the trip from store to house is at most 2 and a half minutes. we dropped the idea. but today my mom went to the deli to get turkey. and she stopped by the pet shop. she took my step dad back later in the day and they disappeared for a good two hours. they came home and told us to come back and se the puppies with them. we all jumped up and met the puppies. an hour later i walked out with this girl. i introduce to you the new puppy. she is yet to be named.

Welcome home, pup!

 I guess this is my new niece?